It has been 14 years since Jason Nabeta left this world, but while he was here he was an amazing and creative soul.

Though I will always have a hole in my heart, I love that his sweet music plays on. It brings me joy to share this piece of him. Listen to this composition he wrote. It was posted on Facebook by Ben Caron on the tenth anniversary of Jason's death and I wanted to re-post it here today because it's beautiful...because it's Jason.

For more go to: All Posts Jason.

In the summer of 2000, Jason Nabeta was taken from my life - far too early, and so unexpectedly.  Our relationship will always be an unfinishable story in my life. One I'll never be able to completely come to terms with. Nothing can change this truth, no matter how much time passes.

When he died, I was away. Far from him and our home in New York City. Alone in a way I'd never been before, I was empty, numb, angry and frightened. Not only did I lose my best friend, my love and my joy, I also lost the chance to say goodbye with others who had known him at AMDA, where Jason and I had spent so much of our time, our life together.

Though I had my own private memorial in my apartment with our closest friends, missing his AMDA memorial has always a source of additional sadness for me. Now, thirteen years later, because my dear friend Ben Caron posted this Video, we can share the service where I longed to be when I first knew Jasone was gone.

For Jason, I will always be grateful.

To read more go to: All Posts Jason.

Related articles

Remembering Jason Nabeta

Eleven years ago,on June 11th, Jason Nabeta - my love and my best friend - left this world. My life has never been the same sense. He filled me and my world with such joy, humor and delight that when he suddenly wasn't there anymore the emptiness was overwhelming and incomprehensible.

For years I still saw him out of the corner of my eye, heard his laughter ring in my ears and felt his wisdom guide me when I struggled with life dilemmas. Even when he wasn't here to hold my hand through the tough times, he's alway had a way of putting things in perspective for me.

The last time I saw him, Jason proposed to me over a burger dinner he cooked for me in his New York apartment...I said yes. And when I didn't hear back from the email I sent him telling him that he could buy a cheap engagement ring at Walmart. I figured he was busy. I'll always wonder if he even got that email.

I'll never forget when my roomate called me where I was at summer stock to tell me he was gone. I couldn't stand up, I couldn't think, I couldn't speak. And from that moment on, I've wished for just five more minutes with him to tell him all that I didn't say.

Now, I can no longer hold him, feel his breath, dance with him or listen to his voice the way I did. Yet, he's always with me. When I get afriad, I think of him and I feel his strength. I hear his laughter. I see his light...

I'm so lucky to have had such a wonder in my world that the loss is so deep. I'll never forget you Jason. I love you. 

Sometimes I can still here him laugh. Sometimes I still talk to him, sharing my news and mulling over struggles in my life. When I'm uncertain about something, I ask him what to do. I know that he understands me, wants me happy and knows me. And talking to him gives me some peace when I don't have any.

But I miss being able to laugh with him. And hear his voice. And touch him. And dance with him. Even though he's always with me, he always just out of reach...and always will be.

 

My dear sweet Jason, passed away 10 years ago today. And although I've become accustom to him being gone...he has never left me.

Over this past decade, I've seen him, heard him, felt him move through the room - but still I miss him, every day. And every day I wish I had just 5 more moments to share with him the way we could before he died.

If I had those 5 moments -- I would thank him, and laugh with him, and cry with him, and kiss him. So I do that now in the only way I can...with my heart and my remembrances of him.  

Jason Nabeta will live forever in my memory and in my heart.

Red's World •  Red's Best • Red Says  • Me • Contact

You are always with me and yet never with me.

                          You are my angel.

I miss what it was like before
                   ...when we could laugh and dance and sing and touch and hope.

Jason Nabeta, who left us 8 years ago (on June 11th, 2000), will alway be remembered and will live on forever in our special memories and imaginations.

Here's to you Jason!!

Kisses, Red

Everyday I see Jason,
exactly like this.

Now, he never changes;
he never ages;
but most importantly,
he never leaves me. . .

even given the fact that
he left this world behind
(far, far too soon)
on June 11, 2000.

It is with great tenderness that I think of him and wish with all my heart he was not just a memory in my everyday experience of life.

At times I feel him near -- but no matter how I try -- I cannot hold and touch and laugh with him still. . .

I miss that.